Guest post on Nerdy But Flirty!

Hey everyone! Today, I’m very excited to have a guest post of mine featured on the amazing geek blog for women, Nerdy But Flirty! It’s called Walking Through Shame, and in it I talk about my history with gaming, the idea of what makes a “real gamer”, and walkthroughs.

I took pride in my ability to combat the challenges in these games. Not only was I building confidence by overcoming their obstacles, but I was challenging the widely-held online stereotype that “girls didn’t play games”. I was making myself special. But I also knew myself: I got angry when I was frustrated with something, and sometimes my brain just wasn’t able to force itself into a game-sized shape. When confronted with a puzzle, I would often (and still do) dream too big or too small, never able to think past what I would do rather than what the game wanted from me.


Meanwhile, a downside of purchasing my games secondhand emerged: just as I discovered my love for them, the Community at Large (TM) had already decided they were shit – or, if they weren’t shit, that there were only a handful of ways to “properly” play them. Following guides or using save games was out; banging your head against a game until you finally figured out what the heck to do was in. The soaring popularity of punishing, twitchy platformers proved that point all too well.

(Read the rest of the post here!)

I’m very proud to be featured and hope that my story helps some folks challenge their own ideas about what it means to be a “real gamer”. And make sure you take some time to check out the rest of the NBF site and give them a follow–they do good work! Hope you all enjoy the post. :)

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A Look at Dragon Age: Inquisition and the Value of Choice

Originally posted on Nerdy But Flirty:


I feel I’ve been extremely candid about my lack of experience with video games. So, it might seem strange that I’m writing an article about a video game. However, I’ve been watching Sarah the Rebel play Dragon Age: Inquisition on her Twitch Channel, so when I saw this Paste article by Austin Walker, I thought it warranted a response.

I’ll give a quick summary for those who don’t feel like clicking the link. Basically, the author states that Inquisition has been getting blasted for the last few weeks for several reasons, from action sequences to political structure. One of the more popular critiques that the author disagrees with is that players don’t get to make any “real choices” in the game. The author goes on to identify this complaint as due to a lack of clarity of stakes, a term that just means that the outcome of a decision isn’t…

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Self-Care Bingo—Play With Yourself for Better Health!


Everyone could use a bit more self-care!

Originally posted on Make Me a Sammich:

I don’t know about you, I have a hell of a time remembering to practice self-care, and I’ve heard the same from a lot of the people I interact with online. Many of us spend a lot of time and energy online fighting for causes we care about at the expense of our mental and physical health and while we know that we need to pause and do things that are just for us—things like social media breaks, playing with the dog, listening to music, or just DRINKING SOME DAMNED WATER—it can be really hard to do so.

That’s why I created SELF-CARE BINGO!

Click for full-sized image. Click for full-sized image.

It’s like an act of self-care I can share with all of you. Yay!

The symbols are intended as prompts. For example, I live in Seattle, so there are many days (weeks, months) when getting sunshine is just not in the cards, but…

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2015 Resolutions

Happy new year!

Happy new year!

Looking back on 2014, I can’t help but be surprised that it’s already over. It was one of those years which never quite seemed to end, and I know more than a few people who barely made it through. For myself, 2014 was a mostly good year. It feels a little odd to say that, when so many awful, painful things happened in the world. But 2014 was the year I made a lot of good memories, found new measures of independence, sense of self, and adopted three amazing kitties. Most of all, I feel like I became a better person in 2014. So there’s no denying that it was, on the whole, a good year for me personally.

At the same time, 2014 was a year of great sadness. We lost far too many good people last year. So many of them were suicides, something that hits me harder than anything else. I miss and mourn them all. I cling to the hope that we can take this pain and this sadness and become better for it, and do our best to prevent the same things happening again in 2015. Maybe that’s a vain hope; but I cling to it just the same.

2014 also taught me a lot about setting more specific resolutions, and for the first time in a long time, I feel like I might be able to accomplish some of my goals. They’re not just faraway islands in a foggy, hard-to-reach “someday”. And thus, in that vein: Here are my resolutions for 2015.

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Choosing My Words and Introducing Rosie’s Phenomenal Insult Machine!

Originally posted on Make Me a Sammich:

BULLSHITwordshurtbrTrigger warning for discussion of multiple potentially difficult topics.

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words can never hurt me.

A few years ago, I posted to my Facebook page a wish that parents would stop (or at least stop and think before) repeating this to their children. Words can and do hurt, I pointed out, and parents argued, “Yes, but this is a tool that maybe empowers them. Something they can say back to a bully.”

Ok, but two things happen when we give them this “tool” to wield: 1. We lie to them and tell them to go forth and lie some more. 2. We we tell them that their feelings are invalid or abnormal or both, and that they should hide those feelings from others. So the “tool” is a weapon to help them feel/seem stronger and they must hide the hurt lest they be seen as (or heaven…

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